Okay. As of recent, a few people have been asking about my situation regarding my unrequited feelings towards this guy. This has caused me to really think about why I continue to like someone who, for all intents and purposes, is practically an untouchable. I was discussing [it was a pretty one-sided discussion - Sorry] with Jake last night and I think I've finally been able to put into words. And so, I'm posting it on here. This is both in answer to people's questions about my continued feelings for him, and, in a way, a validation for myself. I don't yet know quite what I'm validating, but, there ya go. And guys, just for the sake of anonymity, please refrain from using his name. Please. [And remember, if you do, I'm the administrator and I can kick your arse of this blog sooo fast]. Thanks, guys.

February 18, 2002 - roughly 7ish [?]
[oh, and before I forget: I got that analogy/example of the straw from Shara. Credit is due to HER]

FlickyChik: this is as best as i can explain it [and i'm fully aware that you didn't ASK for an explanation]..
eeljamming: oh, im listening
FlickyChik: it's not even that i like him, i mean, i do, i'm not going to deny that any longer...but, the reason i think I KEEP liking him is just to have SOMEONE to think about
FlickyChik: ya know when you tie a straw wrapper and pull it to see if the knot remains, thus showing whether or not the person you're thinking about is thinking about you, too [maybe it's a sappy girl thing]...well, i always think about him for that
FlickyChik: and i KNOW that i dont stand a chance with him at the present moment, but just being able to get excited over the thought or the image of someone
FlickyChik: i mean, it's not even really him, it's just all the different things that are encapsulated in him, all the different things that are on my list of the perfect guy..it just so happens that he meets like 75% of all the requirements
FlickyChik: it's nice to have someone to think about
FlickyChik: even if i know that he's not thinking about me
eeljamming: =)
FlickyChik: and there ya have it

And there YOU have it. Sorry, this post was sort of self-centered. Thanks for reading.